Sunday, May 8, 2011

Yikes... rage.

Apparently the past 2 weeks of tapering, in conjunction with life stress, have made me just one big stewing brew of miserable rage just waiting to seethe out.  I had a really good 9 miler with training buddies last Saturday, and then didn't run much this week due mostly to tapering and a tiny bit due to laziness (as I said... I could've ran a few more miles than I did).  Then today I went out there and was feeling a little icky for the first half mile.  But then I started running like a superhero when I started completely losing it and yelling.  I knew I'd been stressed and upset, but wow... I didn't realize how upset, I guess.  I hadn't even planned to talk about any of the stuff that just started spilling out.  My poor training buddy/friend who was along with me patiently tolerated it while I went on really loud yelling rants about a couple of my exes.  One rant after another, complete with rage-filled gesticulating, in a continuous stream for 6 miles.  Once I was yelling I started running a lot better and feeling a lot better. People were looking at me because I was being so loud and somehow I didn't even care. So much for me being a relatively quiet, calm person.  And my poor running buddy just said a lot of  "Yeah, I understand. Yeah, it's ok, really.  Yeah, that is total crap."  Guy is a saint.  (W., if you're reading this, thanks for the therapy session :o)

I guess I just needed to vent some of the hate out of my life and get some stuff off my chest.  I can't even express how much better I felt after all of that.  Girl just needed a good yell, combined with a good run.

Finally, I feel like I can focus my energy.  I think I'll be ok for this marathon now.  If not, I'm sure I can find some lingering angst to draw upon to help propel myself along...haha.

1 comment:

  1. Dude, the fact that you managed to run 6 miles while yelling and gesticulating is a sign of how freaking fit you are! Think of all the extra expended energy, and how much it would mess with your breathing. No joke. You don't need to worry about being prepared for this race!

    And you know what, I think "girl just needed a good yell, combined with a good run" is probably a pretty safe bet in life. Remember that one! (It made me smile)